The Last City Read online

  “Conquest,” a voice called.

  I froze. The exhaustion barely registering. No way! That meant I won.

  “Lydia,” Jordan grabbed me, pulling me off the simulation, and squished me into his chest. “You did it!”

  “Congratulations,” Lena said, smacking my shoulder as she passed us by in mid-air, but she wasn’t smiling. And if Jordan hadn’t been holding me, she would have sent me crashing to the ground. “Now, do it again,” she called back.

  Jordan released me, telling me to rest first, he then cast a glance in Lena’s direction, defying her decision. But she didn’t respond. I stepped off the training mat, not wanting to dwell upon what I’d just done. I was sure I wouldn’t be able to do it again, and part of me wished the simulation hadn’t announced it to the room.

  I leaned against the wall watching Jordan fight at his own level, although not so much watching him as staring through him. Most of his moves were faster than I could focus upon anyway. However, I had noticed lately, that he’d been practicing with an intensity that led me to believe he was on a mission to reach his next level. And I had to wonder if he was just being overprotective of me, or if he had another motive.

  “Ten,” was all I heard, and it pulled me out of my thoughts.

  I focused upon him then, and the mess on the floor before him. The simulation was headless. Gross!

  “Jordan,” I whispered, as he rose.

  But he didn’t hear me. Instead, he stared down at his dismembered partner as though he was prey, and he’d won the hunt. It was a predatory glare that I hoped to never see upon Jordan’s face again.

  “Time for Mason to come out of his box,” he mumbled, I was sure to himself.

  “No!” rang Lena’s voice, clear across the room. She strode toward us, glaring at Jordan as though he’d done something wrong.

  Dax ended his own training, and followed her over.

  “No, what?” Jordan asked.

  “This means nothing,” Lena said, indicating the simulation, who was now whole again and awaiting his next partner. “It’s only a simulation. You want that level, you prove it in the stadium. With me. Right now.”

  I wanted to step between them. He couldn’t fight Lena. I couldn’t even think about that. Fighting in the training rooms was one thing, we always stopped at a certain point. But in the stadium, it would not end until one or both were dead or unconscious, or worse. But most of all, I wanted Jordan to lose that look upon his face.

  However, before I could step forward, Dax was beside me. He placed his hand upon my arm, holding me back.

  “Don’t,” he whispered. “Let him go through it.”

  “Remove your hand,” Jordan said, without looking back. It was casual, mildly threatening. But it brought the smile back inside me. Dax immediately complied.

  “Let’s go,” Lena said to Jordan.

  “No,” I huffed out the word, and stepped to his side.

  Jordan reached back without looking at me. He pulled me behind him, wrapped my arms around his waist, and held me there. Most likely, so that I couldn’t see his face.

  “Jordan,” I whispered into his back.

  “I need you to stay here with Dax,” he said, and interlaced his fingers with mine.

  I sighed. But I relented. I wasn’t sure if this was even a good time to reach out to him with my soul. If his was in turmoil, it might be best to do as Dax had suggested and let him go through it. So, I reluctantly released him and watched him walk away.

  ∞

  I couldn’t say how long I stood in that one place. It could have been moments, minutes or hours. I didn’t know what to do. Or how I was supposed to react. I guess I should have been happy for him, as any warrior would be for another’s achieving that level, but that was the furthest emotion from my mind. Happiness had no place in this.

  “You know as well as I do that he’ll be ok. If anything happens, Haize is down there.”

  But I couldn’t respond. All I could do was stare at the last place on the wall that he’d passed through.

  “I think he’s more concerned about Lena,” Dax continued.

  I didn’t understand his comment. He was most likely only trying to distract me. But it got my attention, and I shifted my gaze up to him.

  “Why?” I asked.

  He smiled a crooked smile as though I should already know, and he glanced across the room at Hammond and Rebecca.

  “Jordan is more like Hammond than… me.”

  Again, I wasn’t sure what he meant, nor if I liked the way he was grinning at me.

  “What do you mean?”

  “He wasn’t raised on Heart. They think differently. I spent years in Lena’s head, before she was brought here.”

  “You didn’t bring her?”

  “Hell no. I knew better,” he said, but he was still grinning at me. I almost didn’t prompt him on. For Dax, not saying what he was so patiently waiting to say, must have been torturing him, almost as much as it tortured me, needing him to say it.

  “And...” I relented. He knew I would.

  “And Lena is female, he has to… attempt… to hurt her.”

  “You don’t think he can?”

  “I know he can’t.”

  “But you can?” I tried to maintain an even volume in my voice, but Dax was looking at me as though he was ready to show me, just how easy it would be for him to take me apart.

  “You want to learn to defend yourself against a certain ward,” he said without any hesitation. “I’m willing to assist.”

  “Lena told you not to go easy on me.”

  “Of course,” he said. “You have Jordan for that, and Haize, Aleric, Mason, etc. What you need is someone to show you exactly what it’s going to take for you to defeat him. For you to feel if not stronger, at least secure in your own ability.”

  Most of his words barely registered. My thoughts had returned to Jordan. Nevermind that Lena was a woman, I had suspected for some time that he didn’t believe she was as strong as the other warriors led us to believe. If he went easy on her, as he thought others had, there’s no telling what Lena would do to him.

  I groaned at the thought. He had to treat her like an equal. He had to fight her the way he would anyone else. He couldn’t show weakness in the Arena. A flood of other thoughts piled one on top of the other, but only one made it out of my mouth.

  He had to fight her.

  “He has to fight her,” I said, finding my voice. “Worst case scenario… the Guardian comes back, it brings back its wards, they take Lena, control her…”

  The color drained from Dax’s face as the realization of all that would follow if the Guardian were to take Lena, sank in.

  “Worst case scenario…” I repeated to him.

  “Don’t do that,” he choked out.

  “What?”

  “That worst… thing. It won’t happen that way.”

  “And you know this, how?”

  “Because I know Lena,” his breathing resumed its regular pace and his color came back. “But you are right. He must fight her. If he doesn’t, and he lets her win…” he trailed off, and tried to stifle a smile.

  It took me a moment to see his point. But a moment was all I needed.

  “She’ll torture him.”

  “Slowly,” his smile widened, as though relishing the thought. “And…”

  I didn’t want him to finish. I exhaled Jordan’s name and took off running toward the wall, to the place where he had exited. But Dax caught me from behind, and tackled me to the ground.

  “You can’t go out there.”

  “I have to.”

  “He doesn’t want you there. He doesn’t want you to see him get hurt. And he doesn’t want you to see him hurt her, if he does. You’d be too much of a distraction for him. Lydia, you need to stay.”

  “She’ll torture him.”

  “And if she does, they’ll heal him.”

  “What�
��s wrong?” Hammond was at my side, followed by Rebecca, echoing his question.

  As Dax explained to them what was happening, I lay there helpless, unable to do anything but stare at the wall. I tried to sense him, but he was keeping himself locked away. I closed my eyes and focused all I had on him. Just him.

  At first, he came to me in pieces. Images like photographs, and snatches of sound, shot through my brain in rapid succession, but they soon smoothed out into that sense of him; of what made him who he was. And I could feel everything. Every scorching burn, every paralyzing blow, every bone shattering punch, kick and slam into the stadium walls.

  But he absorbed it all. He let it in, neither acknowledging the pain nor reacting to it. Just accepting it as fact, moving through it and doing what was needed.

  I groaned at the sense of him shutting down, at his emotions suppressed and locked away, until there was no him. There was only the fight.

  “Lydia, stop. Disconnect,” Dax said, rolling me over, and shaking me. “You can’t feel him go through this.”

  I did stop, but not because Dax said so. But because Jordan was falling. His soul was leaving.

  And the look on Dax’s face mirrored mine.

  “Come on,” he moaned.

  He pulled me up and through the wall. Then without hesitation, he jumped off the outer ledge, and I jumped with him. We flew as fast as we could to the stadium, straight over its pointed side and down to the hard, dirt floor below. But I couldn’t see either him or Lena.

  Seph, a warrior whom I’d come to learn was Lena’s fighting match, came running out to us.

  “What are you doing here?” he demanded of me. “You can’t be here now.”

  “Where are they?” I pleaded.

  “With Haize,” he said, indicating the wide, darkened entrance behind him. I felt somewhat relieved at his lack of emotion. I was sure if anything really bad had happened, his face would have given it away. But as I thought this, I realized that his idea of really bad, and mine, might be worlds apart.

  “Follow the tunnel left,” his companion said.

  Dax pulled me along behind him and we ran in darkness, or it could have been my inability to breathe that caused black spots before my eyes. But eventually he stopped, and I stopped as well by slamming into him. He grunted as he caught me, and then righted me.

  “You can’t go in there,” Castor met us, blocking the way. Beside him was Connor, willing it seemed, to do whatever task his father-in-law asked.

  “Castor,” I pleaded. “I have to see him.”

  “No, you don’t. Haize’s orders. You must wait. Both of you. Until Haize says so.”

  “You can’t do that to me,” I pleaded. I couldn’t feel him. I couldn’t sense him. The last time this happened, his heart had failed. And if Haize didn’t want me to even see him… I couldn’t think about how bad it had to be. “Castor, please.”

  I didn’t see Connor move from Castor’s side. My focus was divided between begging Castor to let me pass, and sensing Jordan, or rather not sensing him. But before I could stop him, I felt his finger touch my temple.

  “No,” I tried to protest. “Connor, what did you do?” But it was too late.

  The briefest of stings lasted only a moment. The last time I’d felt this, was by Haize’s hand, and that time I was out for most of the day.

  Hoping someone would catch me when I fell, I waited for the darkness to pull me under, but it never came.

  This time, I remained standing, awake and aware. My breathing evened out, and the tension diminished, along with the pounding in my head.

  I was calm.

  I should have expected that from Connor. He wasn’t into their whole fighting thing, which caused Castor no end of misery. But instead, he’d volunteered to work with Haize and Gaias. They’d accepted him as one of their healers.

  “Lydia,” Dax said. “I can’t feel her either.”

  He led me to the bench that lined the opposite wall, and I realized he’d responded to my thoughts, not to what I’d said.

  I looked up at him. His face was as white as mine must have been, but still, I felt compelled to question him. It wasn’t important, but we could both use the distraction.

  “When did you learn that little trick?” I asked him.

  “What?” he looked at me, confused.

  “You can read my mind now.”

  “No, I can’t.”

  You sure as hell can, I thought back to him.

  His eyebrows went up in response.

  “You didn’t know?”

  “Lena said there was no reason why I shouldn’t be able to. They’d run every scan they knew. The pattern was there, I just thought it hadn’t developed enough.”

  “I’m not sure I even want to know about these scans and patterns,” I mumbled. It reminded me of every time I’d looked at one of Haize’s or Mason’s screens. Just a jumble of lines, letters and numbers.

  He chuckled, no doubt at my thoughts. “They’ve already scanned you and him,” he said.

  “They what?”

  “They had to. They need to keep track of who does what. In case… you know.”

  “The wards take us,” I hoped that wasn’t what he meant, but there was no other conclusion.

  “Coming here, opening up to one another the way you have, the way we did, we’ve changed, just a little. We’re more receptive to each other and everything around us.”

  “But I can’t read his mind, or anyone else’s for that matter.” I was quite sure I would know if I could.

  “Are you sure though?” he said, looking up at Castor.

  At that moment, Castor stepped aside and Haize opened the door, motioning for us to go in.

  I stopped when I entered. They were both upon tables, neither moving.

  “What’s wrong with them?”

  “They’re sedated. Fully healed. I want them to sleep it off.”

  “You want what?” I knew Lena better than that. She wouldn’t want that.

  “Neither were conscious when they were brought in anyway, I’m just keeping them that way.”

  “Why?”

  But she didn’t answer. She only looked at me as though debating internally, about whether she should.

  And instead of responding to me, she turned away, and set to work upon others that had straggled into the room.

  I stepped closer to him, unsure if I should even touch him. But Haize had said he was fully healed, and so I decided to climb upon the table. I nestled my lower body between his legs and rested my head upon his stomach. Then wrapping my arms around his hips, I released my soul to touch and warm his. But he was too still, even on the inside.

  I didn’t want to think any more about what may have happened, and so I closed my eyes and waited.

  ∞

  It was his fingers in my hair that woke me; I hoped I hadn’t been asleep too long. We were still in the medic room, mostly empty now, and it was most likely dark outside. I felt his soul caress mine, and the warmth within me soared around his, happy to feel him again. I rose onto one elbow and tried to smile.

  “Are you ok?” He asked me!

  “Am I ok! Are you ok?”

  “Of course,” he said, smiling.

  I looked across the room. Lena and Dax were gone.

  “I hope I didn’t disturb you,” I said.

  “I doubt you could have, even if you’d wanted to,” he mumbled, and then inhaled long and deep.

  “How long was I asleep?”

  “I have no clue,” he said, sitting up. “But let’s go home, yes?”

  We didn’t speak again as we left. I was hoping he would volunteer at least some of the details of the fight, but once we’d made it to the trail that led to our cottage, I gave up waiting for him to tell me, and began to ask. But he spoke before I could.

  “I’m sorry I made you stay behind,” he said, sincerity filled his soft tone. “When I beat the simulation, I saw
the look of disgust upon your face. I didn’t want you to see me in that state, fighting that way, and hurting your friend.”

  “That look upon my face was not aimed at you, or because of you. It was the sight of the headless figure. I wasn’t expecting it. And besides, she hurt you too,” I told him.

  “Yes, she did,” he said, through a grimace.

  “What happened though? Who won?”

  He chuckled and stared at me in disbelief. “While I admire your faith in me, you shouldn’t have to ask,” he said, and moaned I was sure, at the memories that were passing through him. “I was determined though, to give it all I had. After everything she’d done to you, and knowing what she was capable of, I needed to be sure of her.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “For a long while I was convinced she was only winning all the time, because they were letting her win. And she, it seemed, was determined to prove me otherwise.”

  “And now?”

  “They were not letting her win,” he said, in a strangled tone. “She is that strong, that fast, that aggressive, and… that vicious.”

  “You’re not going to give me details, are you?”

  My gaze was unwavering, but so was his when he answered, “No.”

  I sensed the struggle within him, saw it crease across his face. I was sure he wanted to tell me everything, but he had fought Lena, someone I’d declared to be my best friend. And so, I contented myself with what he was willing to share. At least, for now anyway.

  Upon making it home, we shared a long, hot shower, just as we did every night. The first time I’d introduced the concept to him, it took him all of one second to appreciate the exquisite feeling of hot water rolling down his skin, as opposed to the cleansing scans he’d lived with in the city. But later that evening, every sense of warmth and safety had left me.

  It was one of those middle of the night moments. An instinct. I woke up knowing that something was not quite right, but also knowing that I needed to give every appearance that I was still asleep. I was instantly aware of Jordan’s body surrounding mine. I was safely tucked within him; his arms were holding me close. And while keeping my breathing slow and deep, I opened my eyes just a crack, to the dark of the night that filled the room.